Speedy: Hey this is Speedy, the newest staff member, showing you guys my very first* interview!!!!! *cricket, cricket* >_> Fine, be that way, remember you’re the ones that bought the tickets to this. Well, anyways, here we have today our special guest, KIRBY!!!!!!
Kirby: *crashes through ceiling on star*
Speedy: *smiles* *grumbles out of corner of mouth* That’s going on your bill, pinky.
Kirby: 0_0 take it out of my paycheck…
Speedy: -ahem-
Kirby: WHAT?! No bill?!? This is worse than Oprah…
Speedy: Well Kirby, it’s well known around the Mushroom Kingdom that you have a habit of swallowing enemies, why is this?
Kirby: Binge eating.
Speedy: O_o What?
Kirby: Well you know, it’s very depressing being pink, you go around saving galaxies with nothing but a plastic sword and a bottle of Tums, and those defenseless villagers go and say, ‘Thank you miss!’ It really bites your ego.
Speedy: Well, personally I would use Maalox Max, but whatever… By the way, what galaxies and planets have you recently saved?
Kirby: Well I saved the planet of Wendy’s from the health inspector!
Speedy: ^_^ *laughs* good one, but seriously.
Kirby: I was serious… but I did save the galaxy of Snickerdoodle!
Speedy: Impressive, what happened, exactly?
Kirby: Well, it was being invaded by the fluffy muffin hugging mumbies, and I courageously slapped them all unconscious and saved the snickerdoodles from infinite doom, and I only cried for a half an hour afterwards!
Speedy: >.> Oooook…. I think the Mushroomian Gazette did a little over-advertising. Well, recently, have you been doing any popularity stunts for your fans?
Kirby: You bet! I’m running for the Mushroomian province of Portabella’s president! Vote Kirby!!! *several strands of poorly-homemade confetti fall down on the lights and burn up*
Speedy: -wakes up a little more- Really? Cool! What are your attributes currently?
Kirby: Well, Mario’s going to be my Vice President.
Speedy: I’m sorry, I said attributes, not disaster roots.
Kirby: *cleans out ear* Oh, well……. I’m not from Texas.
Speedy: ^_^ I think you have my vote!
Texan Man: *stands up and rips off cowboy hat* What have yall jerks got against Texas?! *runs on stage*
Speedy: Oh my god he’s got a cattle prod!! *leaps out window*
Kirby: *dodges rabid Texan* <_< >_> *swallows cameraman, grabs star and takes off*
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